How: Hire a professional line sitter (these really exist)

Why: Do you really want to wake up at 3am to stand in line for four or five hours? Tickets are “free” but your time is not. 

What: $100 for a pair of tickets (you don’t get to choose your seats, but all the seats are good), and they’ll deliver them right to your home or office anywhere in the city. Search on Craigslist or send a text message to the Same Old Line Dudes – 347-744-WAIT.